I fucking hate female friends. There. I said it. Getting pregnant, didn’t change that fact. Honestly, I couldn’t stand how often I would hear how imperative it is, that I have a close-knit group of mom friends. You know, the ones that will support without judgment and will lift me up whenever I’m feeling down. The ones that will check in on me and make sure that I have everything I need. The ones that will be a shoulder to cry on and to provide advice and guidance ONLY when they are asked. Every single time I heard that, I wanted to straight up puke.

I have been on this planet for almost 30 years, and I have yet to find girl friends like that. Fuck, I have yet to remotely have acquaintances like that. I don’t know if it’s just where I live or what, but the ones that I’ve encountered were the furthest thing from supportive. On the contrary, they will judge every single decision you make and almost every facet of your life.

Oh, you plan to have an epidural? You’re weak. Oh, you want to opt for a c-section? You’re not a real woman. Oh, you plan to deliver in the hospital? Be prepared to lose all power and decision-making abilities. Oh, you’re planning to vaccinate? Good luck with the autism. Oh, you don’t rub liquid gold on your kid’s diaper rash? You must be poor. It’s one thing after another and nothing you can do will ever be right. You are Satan, no matter what.

Why have mom friends if they aren’t really your friends? I know I’m just Negative Nancy over here and I really wish I wasn’t. It’s easy to feel this way, though, when I constantly see women knocking each other down and continue to kick them when they’re already down there. It’s almost like no one wishes happiness for each other and jealousy always seems to rear its ugly head. One woman’s success is another woman’s bitterness. One woman’s child gets into a prestigious school, that maybe another woman’s kid gets rejected from, and there’s anger instead of congratulations. Why? We are all we have and in today’s society, we need each other now, more than ever.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m definitely not saying that all women are like this. I know that there are

fantastic women out there. I know that there are ones that are the biggest cheerleaders on the sidelines. There are ones that wish nothing but the best for other women and are genuinely happy for one another. As of right now, I have nothing but a sour taste in my mouth. My guard is up so high and unfortunately, because of my past experiences, I am always so quick to assume the worst.

 To be truthful, I have hope that I will eventually meet decent ones. As my son gets older, I know that he will be social, which, (maybe unfortunately?) will require me to be social, as well.

 You bet your ass that I will put on a happy fucking face and meet the mommies.

 I just pray to God that these are decent women and not complete assholes.